It was like the Ritz Carlton of jails. I got introduced to our criminal system the right way.
you lied. pity sex is amazing.
Ya after that i took a dump on a car... We're definitely partying with him again
I'm puking to John Mayor, save me. Or at least change it to somethong beyyt
Responsibility: Hiding your beer when your DWI clients who are out on bond come to talk to you at bars.
So I vote that we skip the bowling and just go straight to destroying our livers.
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
He held the kayak still so I wouldn't tip over while projectile vomiting. If that ain't true love, I don't know what is...
It makes no sense at first, you go with it, it's fun and entertaining and then a disaster
If my eyeballs could make a sound to describe how they feel they would just say uhhhhhhhhggggggghhhhhh.
At 38 I had to open a Snapchat account to communicate with my 21 yr bf. where is my life going.
It's amazing the amount I can accomplish with a glass of wine in my hand.
She rode me wearing nothing but a Santa hat. Merriest fucking Christmas!
I just had sex with the kid I walked next to at my first holy communion
That is our entire relationship. We match bowls and give each other head. What more could you possibly want?
Randomize
