i have i love cock written on my hand and a vagina drawn on my arm and i just finished eating breakfast with the whole fam for mothers day
ahah at least you got away with it
nope...my gran was the one who informed me
Why does Jon Cryer have a career?
That is a good question.
i just fingered the ice cream at home instead of getting a spoon
been there done that
fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
I just masturbated into a dress sock. I feel fancy
I dont even clean my room anymore .. i drunk proof it for when i come back smashed with a guy
Not cool at all. Last night I organized my condoms by expiration date. I need to get laid.
I'm watching him slurp a whole mango out of her hand. It's disturbingly arousing.
Not good... He ate my chips. Thats not a sex analogy for anything. My actual potato chips... gone. I lost on both ends.
Current state of being: shivering like a new born kitten on the bathroom floor
All I know is if i get a free preview weekend of HBO then I am recording Kindergarten Cop.
Hey, if a dude can't randomly belt out Whitney Houston tunes from time to time, is life really worth living??
They were so sore! Either I have bed bugs or you were biting my nipples last night and don't lie to me.
I think it stinks she’s cheating on him. My vagina on the other hand is tingly thinking about a summer of sexual healing
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