Hands down the best time I've ever had barfing.
I have fb friend requests from two random swedish brothers... Must have something to do with that hostel I stumbled into on mardi gras
Just made my alarm the Lion King song. Too excited about waking up to sleep.
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
i feel like i was in a swimming pool of captain and coke and had to drink my way out
This vodka tastes like I'm not going to class tomorrow.
the saddest part is, this is not even the first time i've woken up in a shopping cart with a concussion.
I've learned life lessons in Vegas. Mostly, drugs are cheaper than alcohol.
Got stuck at my fwb place for three days because I decided sex was more important than my safety in the weather. Worth it.
You have a long distance relationship and I have a long distance snapchat sexting buddy. If that doesn't describe who we are as people then I don't know what does.
Is it completely inappropriate to base my morning after pill purchase on if they sell coffee or not?
We are not having sex in the fucking kindergarten
He gives me the same feeling I get when someone puts a margarita or German chocolate cake in front of me
The economy cant be that bad, I willingly got fired to bang her again.
He doesn't understand the concept of a strip club. He keeps falling in love
Randomize
