ya dads aren't the best wingmen
At my boss' house at a bbq. Had a few beers. Taking a poop - there's no TP...this is my nightmare.
We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
It will be a surprise...all i can say is stripper clown
I'm just trying to jam my tits into some coconuts and I'll be on my way
Our local strip club now has karaoke. Do you realize what this could mean for my sex life?
high enough to want to lick peanut butter off of Michael Buble's vocal chords as he serenades me.
Bombed my 8 a.m. exam and the liquor store doesn't open till noon. Drinking unfinished beers from last night till they open.
I miss you more than I would miss junk food if I went on a diet. And you've seen me eat, you know how desperate I'd be.
There's something very strange about masturbating in a hotel room. I feel like I'm cheating on my room...
I believe in weed hangovers. To say the least.
Why is there a waffle in the knife drawer?
The real question is why are there knives in the waffle drawer.
Does anyone remember last night? Because I still don't know why I now own a goldfish and a ceiling fan made of pizza?
dude. i woke up on a random lawn wearing only my boxers, with all my clothes hung in the branches of a nearby tree... no more shrooms
Randomize
