Im wearin a dollar bill hat and tgkin a big girl home. Lifi is gmwnd
drunk pissing on my closed toilet lid is actually quite a sobering experience
The dog threw up again, this time IN the toilet. I've taught him well.
sorry for the blank pocket text. My penis obviously has nothing to say to you.
He's going to regret telling me he doesn't care if i shave or not...
In their defense you were hugging a watermelon for a good portion of the trip
I basically have a picture with a half naked foreign exchange student. He kept screaming rolltide and i felt like a traitor
I once puked on the side of the hwy driving home and it somehow made me feel more Canadian. So don't rule it out
If I have to go to the hospital, at least put my pants back on. It's been a fantastic night.
dont eat that thats our sex nutella.
Apparently drinking in your car before going into a sales meeting is frowned upon. We are car sales men not doctors.
He was stoned and starts screaming, "I ain't got but a dollar, I wanna hear waterfalls!". Maybe he can hang with us....
I woke up naked buried in snacks. Best night ever.
I officially have worse injuries from a baby shower than roller derby.
Yo did you say we are blacking out saturday night and playing dodgeball?
Yeah for relay for life. Its for cancer
Randomize
