Were we dating when my roommates and I had the 'everyone gets laid' part?
Ya
I used to kick so much ass
these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
She looks like an uncircumcised penis in a hat.
just convinced someone I was a virgin. I love when people don't know me.
she insisted that i refer to her boobs by name.
I never want to hear the words 'my therapist says . . . ' while naked again.
So far we've hooked up on a pool table, on a public bathroom counter and now in a little league baseball dugout. We haven't even made to a house yet.
Blah blah blah. Just come home and put a baby in me.
Me, him and the recently stolen carpet walked down the road and into the strip club. We had to check the carpet with our coats, it didn't mind missing out too much, later the door guy at Subway held carpet during late night sandwich selection.
You just kept screaming "COME GET ME OFFICER, MY ALLIGATOR MEANS BUSINESS" while swinging a beanie baby alligator at him.
Some dude peed on tonys floor because drunkness
They offered him a bucket as he was peeing and he was like "Nah, I'm good"
you just won the triple crown of sex! your prize is more sex.
Where is everybody?
It's pretty much split between the strip club and jail.
The only thing I want for my birthday is a divorce from you.
this is the second night in a row i've fucked a guy i met on craigslist. and it wasn't even a post for sex. i posted a housing ad. A HOUSING AD
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