what happened last night??
everyone saw ******'s vagina
and that's just the beginning
Fuck appropriateness.
Just got kicked in the balls by a girl in tap shoes. Fuck EVERYTHING
No stds, not pregs, and lost two pounds. I'd call that a successful two years of grad school.
This kid is too lonely to be my drug dealer.
say it with me now .. the "golden" penis. his nickname does not disappoint.
He Facebook stalked his way right into my pants.
Way to high for badminton right now. This is gonna be a shitshow.
But I just had this pork p�t�. It was dick grabbing.
OMG I WAS JUST THINKING ABOUT HOW OUR FRIENDSHIP IS SO REAL BECAUSE I SHOW YOU DICK PICS AND WE LAUGH TOGETHER.
That was right around the time that the drunken mess pulled out his dick in front of myself and like 10 other people and started peeing all over the train platform while saying, "Sometimes a bear gets you brother. Sometimes a bear gets you."
Pretty standard Thursday night commute for you, no?
Slap a cop in the butt for a felony charge. Check.
She gave me a boner for the first time in 9 years.
I LinkedIn messaged people about jobs when I was blacked out
I had to replace her wine with red vitamin water. So if she’s alive, you can thank me
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