The girl here has a popped collar. Can I slap her?
Yes. For all mankind please do.
she had condoms in her med. cabinet - magnums -I don't think I'm tall enough for this ride
My boyfriend texted me as I was texting some random hookup from last night. His text: "Morning baby" My response: "Your cum is in my hair"
sweet and enthusiastic is code for tiny dick.
Every time I hit my bowl my neighbors set off fireworks... I stop, they stop. I start again, they start again. Too high for this.
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
At this point do you think buying mom a pot plant would be funny or highly inappropriate?
Well regardless of where or with who you will be blacking out and i will be pouring shots down ur throat like a baby bird
And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
I tried to tell her I've only slept with 3 other people...she then named off 5 of her sorority sisters I fucked and asked me if she should continue
Nothing is working I'm going to die alone and on hold with a State Farm representative
Saying someone's good at giving head is like saying someone is good at pouring juice like there is that one girl who will spill it everywhere but for the most part it's not that hard to be good at
...and if you can get the necessary ingredients to make the Buffalo Chicken Melt, I will latch forever at your Teat of Justice.
He and I didn't so much date, as watch cartoons and go down on each other.
Omg in one week, two guys with their own names tattooed on their bodies had their tongues in my mouth. Self loathing shall commence now.
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