Told a girl i wanted to feel her bellybutton from the inside... I need to learn how to flirt
At the bar dressed as a taco. not a typo. Come down.
Class is significantly more awkward when you know that your teacher knows what you look like with your legs behind your head... Just saying.
he said 'i love fucking you, ashley'. it was the most romantic thing he's said during sex because he actually used my name.
And it just wouldn't be a Thursday night without me having to cuss out a foreigner. The streak continues.
she let a homeless guy feel her up so she could go for a ride in his shopping cart
Also, I guess I made friends with the guy who caught me peeing behind a bush.
Well, our assistant supervisor caught us on the back stairs...he invited us on a double date with his fiance and him. I guess our job approves of the relationship?
On NPR this morning, farmers are feeding weed to pigs. The result: pot bacon. Life just got better.
And amler is totally snoring loud as fuck sitting on the steps with her feet in a puddle of soda puke
Do u remember giving me permission to fuck ur dad and then getting super pissed at me when i said ew?
I was eating leftover taco bell in bed at 3 in the afternoon. I can't throw any stones
Im experiencing the awkward moment after realizing two of my straight female friends have had sex with each other
i just wanted have a romantic star gaze moment with him. untill he let out a massive fart.
He has an 8 pack! HE HAS AN 8 PACK!!!!
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