So how come you never look me in the eyes anymore when we make love?
There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
Oww! U thought rug burn was bad! Fuckin carseat burn hurts like a mother!!!
Wtf?
Use the slutty part of ur brain.
A few things for you to consider: 1. Drunk enough that I'm looking up the dictionary definition of Wish. 2. Dictionary.com has new features. 3. Windows is offering me 500 business cards for 5 bucks. 4. I've always wanted a card that says I'm a ninja
i was really disappointed no one would drink beer from our cleavage last night except for us
I'm not sure if it was the 11 shots or your naturally vibrant personality but I recall you being quite noisy that evening
I'm sure you can think of a way to make money.. God didn't give you boobs that awesome to waste them feeding your children..
seriously, i never want to drink Robitussin again. her face was melting as i tried to convince her i wasnt high and i probably would have fucked ray. his parents thought i was a sweet charming lesbian.
This is why you are not allowed out in public.
He convinced the breakfast vendor to melt twix bars on bacon for me at 4am. He slurred every word. I think I found my prince charming.
It's Christmas, you should know what a virgin is.
im drinking out of a pineapple, so yea.
random boy in my bed. last night wasnt a dream. fuck.
U just kept yelling her vagina wasn't a priority bc u had a bowl of cheerios calling your name
she hand cuffed me to the bed naked, jumped off the dresser naked, hit her head on the fan and knocked herself out. when her mom came home i had to call her for help, she could have died man...
At some point i am going to say to you "i have this really bad idea! You in? " just go with it.
Randomize
