So the last day on the vacation I woke up in the bath tub. My mom said she asked me during the night what I was doing and I said, "swimming."
i found out what alaskan girls practice during those six months of darkness
Is there a nice way of saying 'touch my penis or i dont really wanna hangout"?
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
I can get head just about anywhere nowadays so that's not much of an incentive, coffee on the other hand...
Sometimes I wonder how different my life would be if I didn't share a weekly margarita with my mom since i was 12
Counseling BFF to break up with her BF. We will get that 3-way
That girl next to you randomly said that she fits into a queen sized pillow case
WTF.
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
I know it basically makes me the worst feminist ever, but I don't want to kill my own spiders. And I will pay my personal spider hit man with sammiches and unlimited , uninhibited access to my vagina.
I also point out to everyone that she looks like DJ's gf on Roseanne.
As long as you keep bringing fries home, i'll keep being naked when you get home
I just woke and boke and made apple pancakes. I'm kicking Monday in the dick.
I don't know what to say to you.
I don't know what I said to you. Start with that.
There’s an entire generation of people out there who didn’t grow up watching Mr. Rogers and it shows. These Boomers need to get their shit together.
Randomize
