we fucked to don't stop believing. most epic sex EVER.
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
After you took the handle off the bathroom door I had to coach the Scottish guy sitting on the toilet, throwing up in his own lap, how to put his pants back on. Yes, I think he won the drinking game.
Had sex five times today because there was nothing else to do. I had no idea snow days could get even better than when we were kids
i think the penis that was inside of me changed my life
you think that next time i come over to do this you can pick up the condom wrappers you used on the other girls
I'm just going to say , cocktail races are not for a Wednesday night maybe not even a Friday type of deal
Whatever you do tomorrow don't let me put on the Borat mankini and yell "POLAR PLUNGE!!" while diving into the pool
The pool is covered.....
Like that would stop me.
Idk woke up on the suite in someone else's clothing and actually broke my ankle
But seriously, I love you and you are a good person and I'll get you some ecstasy
Let's be honest, college orientation is going to be "here's how to drink everclear"
Note to Self: Never again eat a weed brownie by yourself two hours before a tornado warning in your exact location.
I forgot a room to the key..so whenever you wake ip and read this...I'm sleeping inthe hallway..please find me
How many times do I have to tell you I'm not bisexual.
.....unless there is alcohol involved
I feel like your boyfriend deserves to know that you're a lesbian.
Randomize
