Yeah. He most definitely jizzed himself in the face.
You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
i just farted in a meeting....took me completely by surprise.
so you made the shocked face and they caught you.
yup.
He had the Transformers symbol tattooed to his chest. We had to do it doggy style so I could laugh into my pillow instead of his face.
shes a 6ft ginger. she brings nothing to the table except for awkwardness
Did you get drunk last night? You put Christian lyrics as your fb status again.
you said you would race him to taco bell but you slipped in the parking lot and just laid there, crying
i need to start buying Plan B in bulk and leaving them at the door. I'm really sick of walking to CVS with my one-nighters
Yeah but sometimes your vagina needs to be fed and when we are drunk we tend to eat junk food
Why is there a traffic cone in the shower? And did you wash it with my body wash? It smells nice.
the amount of 23-year-old guys who have seen me naked is starting to get a little worrying
Blacked in cold and wet, with them areound me singing Aaaaall we are saaaaayiiiing is YOU PEED YOUR PANTS
Right?? Give me some apple scented candles and I'm a fall wet dream
Yea he was still drunk. He wore a Toga to his job interview.
You know that tattoo place next to Dallas? The naked sexy frog on my neck is proof that their "won't tattoo if drunk" sign is bullshit!
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