She tried to have sex with him but he quote unquote respected her
I just made friends with the guy at the coffee shop in borders. And by that I mean he stared at me until I was uncomfortable and left.
The sex was so not worth the four dollars it cost to drive over the bridge
She just did a myspace photoshoot with her baby
And don't be too jealous. Drinking alone watching a chick flick and masturbating isn't nearly as glamorous as it sounds
just got my girl scout cookies. wanna get high?
I just got while a charlie horse while orgasming...most confusing feeling ever...
bro i finally banged her last night on our basement couch
I'm at this frat party right now and yelled "my little 16 year old brother finally lost his virginity." They gave you a standing ovation
I now beleive the Trojan Ecstasy ad "feels like nothing's there". They forgot to add "...cause the condom broke."
It would be one hovered percent delicioui
I found a phone book at the party and started calling everyone with my last name asking if they wanted to form a club. I'm meeting one for brunch tomorrow...
If I walk in on you beating off, at least have the fucking decency to STOP BEATING OFF!
I sent him a tit pic with the caption, "Mt. Arie and Mt. Hola are ready for expedition." Too nerdy?
this dude is way too smart. he just explained to me the different scientific components of drugs while we smoked. i said i loved icecream.
it was a 'fall asleep on the bathroom floor after puking bc the cold tile is legit more comfortable than your bed' kind of night.
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