Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
mom took my condoms, found one in the trash the next day
I know she was great
Just pure bliss will emerge from Charles, my tranny bong.
How can I not totally like a guy that told me my boobs were too big for me to be taught how to play golf?
Well I found out I was essentially dumped and replaced by a hipster and apparently offered a girl $95 to go out with me. In the spirit of the Olympics I will not be spending any time on the medal stand.
It's awesome, he has so much more free time now that he's not screwing other girls behind my back
He got cut off by the bartender. So he kept buying people drinks of they would i get him a drink. Before you know it him and 8 people were outside the bat trying to get people. To by them drinks
hey now, it was 6 bucks for 5 shots. you would have lost your panties too.
You jumped into so many bushes for no reason
I guess there's no delicate way to say "I'm 90% sure I sucked his dick in the bathroom of the bar."
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
Because you touch yourself at night.
...What time of day am I supposed to do it?
so this maintenance guy stood at the corner of my cubical and scratched his balls for like a full minute cause he thought no one could see him
Apparently the girl he banged in the bathroom yelled at him for hitting on me all night. But whatever, he was holding her hand for most of it
Uh oh. Put down the vodka cancel the clowns and get rid of the donkey
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