cum and cheesecake for breakfast...don't fucking tell me pride week isn't awesome
my mom took me to a gay bar and went on and on about all her good times at clubs... i now know where i get it
did u get his digits?
yes his name is chazbangbangbang according to my phone...
Being the only sober one.. I had to feed you guys doritos. You kept licking my fingers.
The office pool is up to $500 if you take a shit in Frank's desk drawer. Time to change the unpaid internship into a cash cow.
Maybe. This hangover is made of nightmares and that thing from the Alien movies.
I can tell right now that knowing you will either be really fun or ruin my life
He won't have sex to beyonce. I hate him.
I want you to get off the plane and get directly into my pants
I got the job! The hiring manager is the sister of a guy I slept with so its like I'm a real adult now
OMG I WAS JUST THINKING ABOUT HOW OUR FRIENDSHIP IS SO REAL BECAUSE I SHOW YOU DICK PICS AND WE LAUGH TOGETHER.
Do not try to steal a picnic table from a park, all you will end up with are sore arms and broken dreams.
We fucked. Had a political debate. I won. So I sat on his face.
Well I've always wanted to get head while playing WoW...
K I'll do it, but mine is going to be WAY weirder. Your not allergic to shellfish, right?
How you run into a glAss door three times in a row I do not know
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