I am watching Grease 2 and properly learning how to apply a condom to a banana. This is a sign from God that this is the closest I will ever get to having the need for one.
There is something about listening to Patsy Cline while pooping that makes the experience so much better.
Wait, we're on the hunt for addys and explosives. They're both in this house somewhere.
Using manwich sauce as ketchup. Not bad. Love college.
I have to keep checking she's breathing. This is why we don't drink on Sundays
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
Found my shoes and purse. They're all strapped together in my neighbor's tree. Need to borrow your ladder. Thanks in advance
Pretty sure the cab driver can even smell the sex coming from between my legs
Topless bubble bath with a lesbian is debatable as a gay experience.
You were being mean. And telling everyone to suck your six inch strap on. People were not pleased
Please be lying.
Im not. Your family was creeped out
I met a bunch of Germans and said in german "this is for the fatherland" and poured a beer on my head
I can't believe he just friend zoned me like that.
Dude, you're not even gay.
Someone came into our hotel room and took our remote
What should I do?
just had an allergic reaction to my dildo. My life is ruined.
I thought it turned out lovely. You got to see me almost naked and I got to be stoned to the point I was content with
Wtf when were you almost naked??
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