how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
So if we break up over this are you still gonna come over and do my dishes?
she told me if people cross their eyes and look at her, they say she looks like megan fox
He thinks that since we have been dating six months, that he can do the helicopter with his penis. Not okay.
I have your dog in a headlock. Se wants my mushrooms.
You ad-libbed two DETAILED rounds of price is right, 1 wheel of fortune, and 1 deal or no deal.... by yourself with sound effects and music included
So Bodhi just sent me a pic of someone's balls with a message that says "I hope you all have a ballin' night." I don't even know what level of friendship to call this anymore.
Oh my god.
The ballsiest level.
I woke up wearing my panties and an eyelash, soo I'd say your birthday was a success.
I swear to god if I see a single piece of genitalia I'm driving back to LI and smacking you back to the Italian Renaissance
You texted me the words "butt stuff" 53 times in a four hour period last night.
I need a pedicure
You need to go to planned parenthood
You are a genius and a whore.
right now I am washing the alcohol and shame off from last night
Also I literally googled "how to fold socks" so that's how my day is going. How's yours?
He woke me with blue berry pancakes and a blow job. He's a keeper.
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