whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
Having your wife answer your cell was so lame. Maybe we can talk when you get your phone, your facebook account, and your balls back.
I'm outside your house...sorry I feel like I don't need formal invites anymore.
you are the weird ass hat to my lady gaga
Just saw someone buying TWO six packs of O'Doul's. WHY ??
Between the two of us weve fucked every guy at this table
I'm making presurgery martini's. You need to be here.
It's kind of awesome I can smoke with my parents and tell them about thetime we used listerine in that bong
If I ever go to jail it will be because of you, I can feel it.
why the fuck is there hamburger meat in the toaster. i repeat: WHY THE FUCK IS THERE HAMBURGER MEAT IN MY NEW TOASTER
At one point I had two blunts in my hand and had no idea where they came from.
New guy moved in the apartment next door. He's a combat vet, 6'4", Adonis body and going to med school. My vagina is chewing thru the wall as we speak.
You took your pants and underwear off as soon as we got to Melissa's and just walked around the entire time like it was completely normal. We even ate pizza together with your vagina exposed. You're my hero.
I woke up with a pillow, shampoo and a plant in my fridge. Eggs in the toilet, and I was wearing three pairs of girls underwear. What happened last night
Yes. With one-hundred percent positivity I can say yes, I do not want you covered in waffles and syrup when I come home.
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