Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
Having dinner with my dad, watching the news and some AIDS prevention ad comes on. My dad then kindly informs me that he doesn't enjoy the feel of condoms.
Anthony wouldn't know good sex if it sat on his face
I hope the walls stop moving before my manager notices that i'm still drunk.
the beer staff turned into a beer spear way to quickly
Do ex girlfriends even count for summer sexcapades. Seems like the damage had already been done
Victory lap
My sister was crawling her way home and kept asking us to carry her,then she insisted on grabbing at our ankles til she passed out, how was your night?
Its kind of weird knowing that im only seeing you that day to fuck in some woods
Somewhere between the 30 minutes of cunnilingus, the improvised song about the Olympics, and the super thoughtful shower beer... I knew I married the right guy
i repeatedly had to ask him if he was into this because he kept talking about random things while i jerked him off. i got annoyed and in order to annoy him back, i told him i wanted to watch him do it. he also talked about basketball WHILE cumming. NEVER AGAIN.
I'd be 10x more excited if going out didn't require pants or the general giving of fucks
A place where it's acceptable to show body parts is not a good place for me to be.
he keeps various drugs in his kitchen cupboard like groceries. that is my new life goal as an adult.
Yeah you were fine except for when you peed under the bar
Goddamn it. Hes got me addicted to his penis
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