How come twittering sounds sexual?
Because of Bambi.
You know you have a problem when you walk into your bathroom find kettle one in your shower and a note you wrote yourself when drunk that says "panties at jared leto's" on your counter
I just saw a stripper wear a tube top around her floppy gut. God bless Michigan.
You never go ass to mouth. That's quite possibly the most important rule Paramedic school has taught me.
He painted his chest for the game... I just fucked an exclamation point.
I do what I can to inject something into your life every day. Today, humor. Saturday. Penis.
And dont tell me its his job to cockblock me just because he's my boyfriend.
He probably has his cowboy hat on, that's his house hat.
if i ever wake up in the morning and don't feel a boner in my asscrack then this relationship is over
Yah... You need to get here. Evan just peed off the karaoke stage.
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
I can't possibly be the only person who has ever eaten Cheetos with a spoon to avoid the powder getting in my fingers
The fact he has had a girlfriend for 5 years and they are trying to work it out isn’t going to stop me from sleeping with him. He said it himself you can’t cheat on someone you love...
all i'm saying is don't blame me if your purses are filled with whoppers
are we talking malt balls or BK?
You have a full penis tattoo of a cobra fighting a mongoose, don't you?
Randomize
