awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
You should just wear a sign that says "I like cheap Chinese food and anal"
I like taco bell too
Court Ordered Rehab!!! Do you think I'll need a swimsuit?
I didn't have a rubber, but my dick had a date with a clorox wipe after we finished. I think I'm in the clear.
of course he's cheating on me, she's 100x prettier and she can do the splits
I apologize for forcing you to look at my boob when we were high. It was uncalled for
i just thought that perhaps i was done with the "boning on someone else's futon" stage of my life. guess not.
I just saw my first passed out person, sprawled out on the sidewalk like they died. I wanted to take a pic but I thought that screamed "tourist"
Who knows? Maybe we can sing afternoon delight into each other's genitals.
Apparently I was proudly showing him the cup I barfed pizza rolls into
It's 3 in the morning and there is a bird chirping it's head off outside. GOD DAMNIT THIS IS NOT A TIME TO SING OF YOUR CHEERFUL BIRD MERRIMENT YOU STUPID BIRD CUNT!
I mean, with your nipple problem im surprised. #hangacoatonem
You know what id love more than anything right now? ..a back rub while eating biscuits and gravy
Cleaned the whole house at 7:30 and after cleaning the bathroom I think I had cocaine on my sweatpants
Amazon is not showing any promising results for penis tree toppers and I am genuinely surprised. Clearly this is a market that needs to be addressed.
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