Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
Why do you proceed to call me "Queen La Queefah?"
he borrowed my computer and saw his name in my recent google searches. Things got awkward real fast.
i am about to cut my stepbrother's hair into a mohawk with the same clippers i use to trim my pubes. god is so on my side today.
I elbow dropped a bag of ice to break it so we could make margaritas. I bled everywhere. Be proud.
I figured out why I insisted on leaving my sweater on the ground outside. I smelled it and I'm 97% sure I peed on it last night
I want to hump her dimples until her face caves in.
So many issues. You honestly need help.
and that my friend is why you dont go in for an eye exam and drop 250 dollars on a pair of glasses after smoking a blunt
It isn't possible and the very mindfuck of that concept gives me a lady boner.
Oh you have the munchies, Dad? That's great and congratulations on the weed but STOP EATING MY APPLE PIE
Did you have ill-advised lesbian sex on the deathbed of their relationship?
Of course. Go big or go home.
You're my fucking queen.
Quick question—how good are you at digging holes? I mean, besides the one you've dug for yourself. asking for a friend
If she didn't block me, she would have known that I sneezed on her toothbrush.
Text me some of your sweat
I got dominos and had to stop whilst eating and take a moment of silence for how good it was
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