I am not having having sex with guys at the moment.
I can pretend to be a girl if you want. I have a tongue.
i just sent this text using only my big toe
Everytime I sleep with him he gives me another hint to what his tattoo means. I'm like a slutty Nancy Drew.
Oh so it was one of those "I shouldn't have gotten in a cab with a random 21 year old girl" kinda nights.
I think I'm finally maturing. I'm happy he found someone. Good for him. I sincerely hope she doesn't choke on his tiny penis.
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
He spent $1100 at a strip club. If I had that kind of disposable income, I'd make a cocaine sandcastle.
I just had nipple jewelry returned to me in the law library.
Brightest idea yet: lets drink enough at ladies-drink-free nights to make up for the cost of tampons. Breaking even on having vaginas!
Oh. I'm probably going to just get a viagra and ruin your life.
Deciding whether to take my sex toys home for Christmas will be the biggest decision I make this holiday season
I'm still, like... really stoked about not having any STDs
OK, but next time I'd like to be present for our make-up sex.
I missed you last night. I'm sure he will never forget the night i sang my heart will go on into his penis like a microphone
ever feel bored AND lazy?
I call it "awake" but yeah...
Randomize
