I just woke up in bed next to my teacher. Does that mean I'm passing now?
we were having sex and she freaked out when i said nipple
I'm wearing an NBA shooting sleeve while jerking off...and yes my arm has stayed warm
you should give me head with plastic fangs in
This is a pre-sorry for hitting on and then sleeping with you're ex
I have acquired 14 pictures of hard dicks tonight... I was on a mission. Don't even pretend you aren't proud.
Welcome to the first annual slutathon and let the men be ever in our favor
I'm going to CVS to meet the Craigslist guy who is going to buy my underwear. If I don't text you within the next hour, plz assume that I have been abducted by a stranger with an underwear fetish.
The ONLY place I sext is in my anatomy class. It's an amped up level of playing doctor.
Well I'm glad your Saturday night went a lot better than mine. I spent mine crying in a McDonald's parking lot.
You know, this is NOT how I pictured my life would be when I was younger, and yet here we are.
I gotta stop fucking the bouncers. We are running out of bars to go to.
You've got the chocolate, drugs and my pants. You hold all the cards...
the only fun thing to do here is drink beer and make mistakes. i feel like im in college again
Unfortunately the rum ran out midway through our viewing and we had to suffer in silence for the rest of it.
Randomize
