you were the first one he came out to and you announced it as the finale while singing karaoke at the bar
I've never watched DWTS before, but this show's got Pamela Anderson, Erin Andrews and Brooke Burke: 3 of my top 10 all time most masturbated to women.
My mom just asked me if I was gay in front of my gf
I think we can all look back on last night and categorize it under, " reason why Cory can't be left at the bar by himself"
Can you send me the video of that girl that got arrested last night? I'm gonna try and hit that and I need something to break the ice with.
I'm trying to make a sex playlist
record yourself crying and put it on a loop.
I think we should go through the tsa checkpoint with raging hardons when we go through LAX. I think we should pass out some viagra to everyone
Get here, there are important joints to be smoked and pies to be eaten
I don't want to jinx anything but I may have found the one.
Cat or human?
Human
I just hooked up with a one legged Australian guy. Hooray diversity!
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
If it involves notarization or the Misfits, I am up to date. Anything else, I know fuck-all.
...Just hit my fuck buddy with my car.
He was so traumatized by the It's a small world ride but he immediately pulled out a flask from god-knows-where and got drunk before the ride was over. The ride operator didn't blame him.
this is the 3rd time this week I've gone to the liquor store to stock up for the next 2 weeks
Randomize
