Bar. Show boob. Just one. Free drinks. Instant friends
Guys only need one. Little known secret. You're welcome.
Was it a mistake telling him I couldn't get the abortion until I was 2 months along on the first date?
They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
Do you think this abandoned cigarette has herpes? cuz I'm tempted.
Ok just saw a girl open a pillbox, dump it out on her notebook and count out 13 adderall tabs and put them in a baggie and leave. Oh hey college.
I just turned in a 4 page paper spelling absolute as "absolut" every single time. I'm an alcoholic
I cleared a drunken path to my bed for you. If you hit clothes you've gone too far.
He probably smells like baby powder and sexual identity crisis.
Who just wakes up in their own bed and assumes "I probably blew some guy last night"
I feel awful
Physically or morally
Physically. The only immoral thing I did was steal money from strippers while they gave me lapdances.
He turned me into a screamer. Guess I'm really not a lesbian.
I'm all for hockey players but dude, he asked me to lick his chipped tooth mid-hook up.
ok now I feel liek a very drunk human instead of a chaos being thanks water
Are you 5:30 blackout again?
Maybe you should slow down tonight...
KINGS DON'T NEED ADVICE FROM LITTLE HORN-BILLS FOR A START
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