I wanna eat
then frost
then eat your cupcake
Partly cloudy chance of praying to the porcelin gods
what part of "i slept with our hot teacher" are you not excited about?!
the part where you beat me to him
fair enough.
She threw up in my garbage can last night and walked home with it this morning so she could clean it out...
She is dropping it off on the way to the bar at 7.
I'm thinking I had intended to send you pics cuz I woke up naked
remember our old mantra: why can't life be as easy as we are?
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
Some guy dressed like Santa just handed me a bottle of tequila. I NEVER WANT TO LEAVE CANCUN
I'm drinking too much free beer
Thats like saying one owns too many kittens. It's not possible.
This is true. I'm still having Jess write "no drugs" on my left hand and "except weed" on my right hand
She got tired so now we're making anyone who has a stupid idea go into her bedroom so she can sleepslur "good idea" or "baaaad idea." We're calling her the queen of the misguided.
I just woke up naked next to a GetGo sandwich and I can hear my cats are eating my combos. So that's my life.
I just have to decide what I love more, food or dick.
When I walked out of the bathroom and you were literally dancing, you looked at me and said 'this is how I dance'. And then continued.
Is there a nice, calm way of telling your friend/housemate/former lover/person who does not reciprocate your feelings that your period is late?
Randomize
