just bailed mom out of jail. Tell me i'm not the favorite child
She jerked me off while she drove us back from Denver going 70mph. It was both the scariest and most erotic moment of my life.
I Apparently saved a picture of the Eiffel tower in between 2 pics of his dick. It appears to be the same size. I fucking love Paris.
Once he past out I measured his penis with my remote.
is pulling out brownies in the middle of class on 4/20 just too obvious?
Was last night real? Did I lick your forehead while you laid in between my legs while we laid next to your boyfriend?
You throw up behind 1 mannequin and it's world war 3 in forever 21
She looks like a hot George Washington...I'm going for it
I'll get tired halfway through and end up passed out at a taco shack honestly
I just interrupted this girl giving a dude head in a parked car on the south side. Going down on your guy while you're parked in front of your house because you don't want your parents catching you is fine by me, just don't block the fire hydrant.
So adding to the list of things my boobs can do, sweeping with a broom is apparently a thing.
I was giving him head and he slipped one of those hats with propellors on top on my head.
His sisters are going to have a heyday finding all those condoms in their bunk beds.
The only good thing about being back at work is supply room boom boom with my office husband
Listen, yo... we need to have a serious conversation about this Dollar Store toilet paper. Because if I’m going to finger someone’s ass, it’s not going to be my own.
Randomize
