So apparently when I roll on X I find 'dick ina box' not only hilarious but also sexually arousing.
I never doubt that you might be drinking at any moment.
I don't know how to say this, but I think you're a fucking bitch and the sooner you die I'll be happier.
Sorry- wrong number! :)
You were so trashed that when you dropped your fruit rollup on the floor, you just sat next to it and cried.
the three of them together have enough kids to fill a barney live audience.
someone just puked in the library. they put up caution tape. i totally underestimated finals week.
If him repeating sorry while thrusting isn't makeup sex than I don't know what else is
still using moms red Christmas cookie plate she sent to cut lines on. not sure I can return with a clear conscious
I wasn't concerned until I realized he was using the vase my birthday flowers came in as a " big glass" for his 151 and coke.
Pizza toast. It's like pizza but on toast. BC we are broke. OMG its so good.
You would never do this sober.
She rode an inflatable shark down the stairs. Viva shark week.
I mean I want to go somewhere. I just don't want to put on pants or behave.
69'd by candlelight when the power went out.
DIBS on your mom for my beer pong partner.
I need to bang the neighbor boy. He’s given three women screaming orgasms this week alone.
Also, my apartment walls are too thin
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