god, you should never be in the FBI. you'd give away america's secrets to any boy who asked.
I am one bad relationship away from having 30 cats.
We're playing Big Buck Hunter to determine who buys the next pitchers. And they said video games wouldn't help me later in life
i bought a pregnancy test with dimes. Is that trashy?
i dont think my parents would of encouraged me to save years of birthday money if they knew what i would eventually spend it on
Just had to explain to the nurse WHERE I have poison ivy. Great Day
Well he's in a two year college so technically hes a senior. At least can we just pretend I'm not robbing the cradle.
No, I didn't like him that much. But I took one for the team. And by the team I mean me and my vagina.
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
Did you get an erection too during Paul Ryan's speech?
A guy in a banana suit just got the whole bus to participate in a call and response version of Bohemian Rhapsody. HERO
I'm not going to pass up the opportunity to be half naked and covered in glitter without facing judgement or legal prosecution. I'll be there.
I just really wish I could go back and unsex him. Waste of my vagina.
Dude...are you really going to start sexting during our friend's memorial service?
I swear she is the Mary Poppins of drugs
Randomize