I tried to give up sex for lent. It feels weird that on easter I'm this excited to be a whore again
so that wasnt chicken after all
She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
Good to know: if a hot girls asks to go back to my place, she probably just needs to vomit all over my bathroom
Were taking his cast off tonite. Need a saw and a gameplan. Meet us at rosies in 30.
she was puking red wine out the car window, telling me about how shes joining weight watchers tomorrow, not okay.
Some chick is drunk waving down a taxi with a slice of pizza.
The last good decent convo we has was when I was trying to convince you to let me watch you pee.
as you might have guessed from my lack of texts, the herpes have calmed down.
Bon Iver should never be played when you just ate shrooms.
He said to use 30 racks as chairs and then drink til we fall thru the box
We were so drunk that when I broke the bottom off a pint glass we decided to make it into a candle holder. How does that happen?!
All three of us got laid last night. This is what is commonly referred to as the Trifuckta.
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
I'm kind of upset that he wanted to have sex instead of watch Harry Potter. I mean it's Harry fucking potter.
Randomize
