We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
If one more person calls me a lesbian I am going to have to give you head in public.
it was a sick party until you insisted on putting on "that's how I beat shaq"
I told him that he could only go home with me if he didn't talk or tell me his name
He passed out drunk on top of me. Fully erect. Still inside me. Woke up like 1 minute later, and continued.
She volunteers at a homeless shelter. You volunteered to drink 7 day expired milk for $3. No chance. Give up.
He held me the entire night. Not endearing kind of way. Like kidnapping or held hostage kind of way.
You tried to get me to kick my booty call out at 3am by tempting me with a trip to ihop
I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation
Dude. I have so much pot that i only worry about running out of lighters
"You can go raw dog up in me". Exact words. I can't decide whether to run, or fuck. Help.
Just zoned back in to real life and found myself chanting "noodle eater noodle eater noodle eater" at my parrot as he devoured a single macaroni
Never let your siblings swipe right.
He shit in the fireplace
The thing about online classes is the prof can't tell this mug is full of beer.
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