I want to stick my p in your. b.
We can make salsa ya know, maybe even some hot sauce. That doesn't mean we're married.
No, i'm not gonna let you give me a footjob on the floor of the cheesecake factory. C'mon.
Hey! Thanks for asking, but it didnt go well. He threw up in the car on the way to dinner. Blind dates arent for everyone.
sometimes i think life is slapping me across the face and laughing, saying "ha ha! you're an adult!"
Just passed a Taco Bell Taco Supreme, still in its wrapper, laying in the grass. I'd like a moment of silence.
May it rest in peace.
It was everywhere, it looked like he just took the leftovers and threw them around the bathroom... Festively...
Tonight just feels like one of those I'm going to lose a shoe nights.
I remember nothing of last night, but I did manage to figure out which frats I went to by the trails of straw across campus.
I have Denny's hours of operations written on the palm of my hand....not in my writing, in a girls writing, is that as good as or equal to a cell number?
Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face.
Bang-toberfest begins!!
IT IS NICKEL SHIT NIGHT
*shot. Why
This guy needs to stop asking about my feet
I'm wearing jeans from 7th grade and drinking a fucking macchiato. This better be a good day.
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