We can't ever have kids because there's a chance that they'll end up just like us.
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
You were mumbling a lot and offered me 20 dollars to leave you alone
So add panera bread to the places i love to eat that i am potentially banned from.
So High I just made Cadbury Coffee. I don't know what it is yet, but it involves Cadbury Eggs and coffee.
im so poor im using the bottom of my laptop to heat my food.
Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably
I just shotgunned a beer alone in the bathroom...what do you expect from me
Just stole a goat. Bringing it to your house to cock block. Blame the goat not me.
All I know is she had me sitting on the kitchen floor with her little Pomeranian eating potato chips And shredded cheese. I don't even know dude. I don't even know.
Should I have a moral quandary about Skyping topless with him while his son slept in the other room?
We're downstairs cleaning up and she turns to me with these big puppy dog eyes and says "Just so you know, I didn't have sex on your couch". You have to hug that.
just gonna show up naked this time. that way i dont have to worry about finding my clothes tomorrow
But break dance skills will only take you so far
Hope you’re getting action boo.
Definitely no. I woke up next to a bag of McDonald's.
Randomize
