Yeah, i think she was German or something.
No dude, she's just got a speech impediment.
Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
so when she was in the shower, I took a pic of my dick with her phone and sent it to her brother saying, this just fucked your sister
on the list of things id be doing when i was almost 30, waiting for a girl to finish shitting the bed wasn't on there.
I dunno if we should get high tonight man. its daylight savings. time travel is just too much for me right now.
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
He told me that if I were a guy he'd go gay for me. Honestly don't know how to take that.
If you have shit your pants within the past two years, please take a seat.
I drank toilet water last night, I can't answer you because my phone is in rice.
How can other people our age be acting like adults when I'm still taking my birth control pill with left over gin and tonic from the night before?
My alarm went off and I went straight for your dick. That's dedication.
Like I'm sorry but "it'll be fine trust me" IS NOT VERY REASSURING ASSHAT. Now take off your pants.
I need a nap, Harry Potter movies, and dick in this exact order after work.
Although now I have "number of cheese slices" as a unit of boob measurement in my head.
Haha i really think theres no better way to tell a paramedic sorry for breaking your nose than a beautiful and healthy edible arrangement...
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