I'm not a real person
I'm sorry, everyone knows that
You work out of a Hotel?
chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
When I told my boss I'm using a vacation day for 4/20, he gave me his personal cell phone number and winked at me.
May or may not have found my way onto a stripper bus. To Chicago.
It got kind of awkward when her dad brought home a 20 something asian girl at 3am
It's a goat... but where the fuck did it come from?
I asked her why she named her vibrator Lorenzo and said it was the name she started screaming her first time.
Do you remember doing synchronized hip thrusts to Michael Jackson? Probably one of my favorite parts of the night
Someone snapchat me a pic of you topless laying on the bar with Scotty pouring a bottle of tequila down your throat. IT'S NOT EVEN ELEVEN YET.
School starts next week
Surprise court date day!!! Wake the fuck up!
Worst way to find out I have a half sister
Is it day drinking when the suns up like when does that start
asking for a friend
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
I JUST NEEDED TO TELL YOU I JUST FUCKED TWO BOYS IN THE SPAN OF LIKE THREE HOURS AND ONE OF THEM WAS MY SISTERS PROM DATE FROM HIGH SCHOOL IM LOWKEY BOTH PROUD AND ASHAMED
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