She's perfect. Funny, gorgeous, 3 tats, been through a lot, bright. I'm in love.
Bonnaroo quote of the day: "why the fuck am i pregnant?!?!" - exclaimed loudly by random hippie.
He kept starring at my ass and repeating "Its Just a beautiful piece of artwork."
this is something i pride myself on being below average for
I mean, I'd wanted to go skinny dipping, hook up with him and have sex on a beach, so last night I basically killed 3 birds with one super slutty stone.
She put up a picture of her grandmother on facebook, looks like the lazy eye runs in the family
The worst thing about it is now I have to find someone else to fuck in the library.
We fucked in my trunk while on the clock....what did you do at work today?
If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.
Fuck man, my Dad's been single so long I get him a year's sub to a porn site every year for for Father's Day
you know you're a stoner girl when you get a callus from your grinder
I found the guy I hooked up with last night on Wikipedia, at least now I know how old he is.
Cooked. Eating pizza. Didn't have a napkin so I took my shirt off and I'm using it.
I woke up this morning to my panties draped around the neck of an empty bottle of bulleit. That is the perfect visual metaphor for my life at this juncture.
She's kind of holyer-than-thou, like god himself came down and said "please cock block your roommate at every opportunity, and if you think she's thinking of sex, tell her she's a whore"
Randomize
