come outside for a special surprise it involves huge boobs
Nope changed our mind. Decided your strange bacon like body odor wasn't what we want to smell tonight.
I am going to be the most sexually active ladybug that he has ever seen
I forgot to mention I threw up in my wine glass AND my neighbors empty cup.
I will never swim in a flooded basement again..
btw found the cat. he didn't appreciate the toilet bath.
The whole movie was ruined when some chick started laughing with what you could tell was QUITE the mouthful. This of course made the guy laugh harder.
You slammed your forties down on the table and yelled "I AM EDWARD FORTYHANDS" then mumbled something about repping Idaho like a champ and laid down on the couch.
Can we talk about the fact that a stranger is doing a line of coke off our living room table right now?
Fuck me first. Then we can craft and watch Terminator 2.
THIS MOTHERFUCKING ROOSTER
IT KEEPS CHASING ME BACK IN THE HOUSE
FUCK THIS BIRD
So you were shitfaced and stole a fucking kayak?
I don't need tinder boy anymore but I do need free sushi
I think my moral compass just broke
my dad just built a flame thrower.. you should probably get here
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