i told my doctor i had 3 partners and one unprotected.. shes a cute little indian lady i couldnt break her heart
so I have this game called 14 beers left. and we both have to drink 7 before we leave
i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
Now I have to picture Dave Letterman having sex with all these women. Im the real victim.
Is it bad to go up to the security desk and ask them for the name of the guy I signed in last night? I have absolutley no clue
The guy in the library beside me just whipped out an entire loaf of bread, a knife and a container of peanut butter and is proceeding to make multiple sandwiches.
I incognito puked under the VIP table. Did Jersey proud.
What are the odds of finding the one hot Australian dude with erecile dysfunction?
My right arm is handcuffed to my leg... Please help.
That's cause you yelled across the parking lot you wanted to eat her out
I just took a dump to end all dumps. Other dumps have already written ballads about it. It was the Armageddon dump. Bruce Willis was there, it was awful.
Just took a shot of tequila with a random guy at the supermarket. Happy cinco de fourth.
Huh interesting. Well thats too bad. Did he catch on?
I doubt it. After sex he sat there naked until the episode of fresh prince (which had JUST started) was over.
Do you think I'm short enough to dress up in a ghost costume and go trick or treating and have people believe that I'm actually a child?
Every time I see this chick she's swimming naked at a pool party. That's gotta mean something right?
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