He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
My milkshake brings 85 to 90 percent of the boys to the yard
5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
i know you like preteen girls so i'm gonna offer you some advice...dump a bucket of glitter on yourself and walk into the sunlight. they will come running.
chlamydia ends and my period begins. this isnt real life
BTW, it's bullshit to say that not doing a shot is unpatriotic. You know how I fall for that.
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
I took my exam the next day still drunk and failed, but I kno for a fact that I filled in the bubbles for my name perfectly
I just overheard this sorority girl saying "It's like trick or treting but for alcohol and with no costumes." I'm jealous.
THIS IS NOT A DECISION I MADE AT ONE IN THE MORNING IM JUST GETTING AROUND TO TELLING YOU ABOUT IT NOW
Some nice lady just gave me a beer out of her purse. I love youth hockey
Roommate charged out of his room in pajamas yelling "MAKE IT RAIN" and just threw $4,000 in fifties onto my head. My Friday night.
he was Irish, I had to have sex with him.
Maybe the "i killed someone" and "tequila makes my clothes come off" comments freaked him out.
Randomize
