I wasn't on board with that statement until "home made dinosaurs"
I need to stop researching the drugs I do on Wikipedia. The parts about abuse and dependency hit too close to home
haha I love it when I find out that girls who were mean to me in middle school are now some random dude's baby mama. thanks, facebook.
It's sad that he has such a beautiful cock and doesn't know what to do with it.
swears the blind dude on this train is faking. Every day he stumbles and falls into a different girl's lap and then has to grab her tits to steady himself.
I just saw a sign that said "STRIPPERS!!! As seen on Jerry Springer!". As if Springer is the highest honor. I'm pretty sure we're in south Georgia.
afterward, he apologized, hugged me, and then gave me a granola bar and said “this is my apology gift.”
I just had a 30 minute conversation about hummingbirds. That high.
I miss high conversations.
Swinging. Is. Amazing.
She's going to get preggers, drop out of school, and end up working at mcdonalds. Great for our mcdoubles habit but bad for her future.
Apple should advertise that their phones are puke-proof. They would appeal to a whole new audience.
I just bought 7 working mopeds off a guy for $300. We are 60% of the way to our gay biker gang dream.
We got buck wild in our animal onesies last night. You kept ripping off your tail in angry rages.
Do you think if i wear this shirt with my bengals boxers this kid will fall out of love with me a little bit because that's what I was going for.
Hooking up with him was lovely.. but waking up in his bed the next morning and finding double stuffed oreos... I mean.... I won
I just walked out of the side door of the bar to come in the front door so no one would know I've been here drinking before our work meeting.
Randomize
