He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
I showed him my bush... on skype.
apparently vodka and oj turns green when you throw it up
basic color theory
At a Jewish lesbian wedding. I stick out like a sore, uncircumcised penis.
In case you were wondering, it hurts when the bouncer throws your phone at you after kicking you out of the strip club for taking pictures.
I have a question: does pizza dipped in chili sound good or am I just really high?
I know you think I'm being paranoid, but can you please make sure Danny doesn't rub my wedding invitation on his balls?
Thanks for the cold. I shartted and sat through a whole soccer game. James made 3 scores.
I am gathering blankets and bags of horse grain to pad my truck bed so I have a comfy place to crash when I get home, without the inconvenience of stairs. Or doors. Or walking. But with the refreshing scent of molasses.
I threw up in the darkest corner of the bar last night, then watched 2 girls freak out in disgust after walking through it. I then realised I puked on the dancefloor, took a picture and proceeded to send it to my mom.
Where did you go?
I'm not really sure. They have flavored vodka. I like it and I'm never leaving. Ever.
Literally I can feel my heart beat in my vagina because of how sore I am
My disapointment is making my balls hurt :(
Pretty sure I got pink eye from the strip club. There is also still beer cans rattling around in my shower.
I thought we agreed to no sexting at the school bake sale...
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