No touching my privates on the ride to school. Pinky swear.
let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
One of my students just wrote an essay on how ninjas, like drug addicts, must realize they need help before they can get better...I gave it an A+
he emptied an entire bag of goldfish onto the bed and rolled around yelling the theme to jaws trying to eat them
Just stepped in shit. Not sure if its mine or the dog's. Get some of our friends on the way back from work and just have the intervention now. I will totally understand.
Just so you know I would totally fuck you. Does that count as a feeling?
So i learned you can't hair-of-a-dog jaeger hangovers.
But don't worry I didn't actually get stitches, although according to the health center I probably should have
I mean really it's like when you're super hungry and you can't decide what to eat, you just know you want food. This is that situation, but for my vagina
Yea... you were given too many get out of jail free cards. God just gave up on you having a healthy and happy vagina.
No. More. Tequila. Even the hot dog guy felt bad for me and you know that guy has seen some crazy shit.
Let the vodka take you where it will. Like Pocahontas, but wasted
'TWAS BUT A GLORIOUS SIGHT. BITCHES.
I think part of my soul drowned in beer and/or jack daniels last night.
We hotboxed his bathroom. going to be a good night
Hotbox went wrong - smoke sets off fire alarm. Firefighters coming
Randomize
