whatever sunny in Philadelphia does on Thursday nights, I'm doing all weekend.
i like that you affectionately refer to him as "creepy" ever time you talk about him
If I had a motorized wheelchair, I'd just chase the squirrels on campus all day.
i like to finish this college football season knowing that not once have I had to masturbate to erin andrews
Mass texted booty calls to all the guys I've hooked up with this year to commemorate the end of the semester.
There are pre-booty call contracts for a reason. I have no intention of calling you tomorrow.
Do you need my fax number or something?
God she is annoying. I am only keeping her around on fb because I want to see if her baby comes out looking like an alien or not.
I cant shower it involves moving...
Just lay there and turn the water on. At least rinse off the shame.
he ran through my sliding door
in his defense that door gets complicated after 10 beers
i love when the champions come out to play im bringin the shock collar this weekend
Wanna hang out? my DILF had to dip out for his sons little league game
Also just throwing this out there I don't think anyone who brings another girl back to your bed to share with you can qualify as a frigid bitch
Explain to me how we're not being documented on? A gynecologist I saw two times 8 years ago popped up on my people you may know list on fb. What in the actual fuck?
I swam, I rode a bicycle, I rode a horse, I danced. It was like a real life tampon advert.
Im 76 percent sure I took a fully clothed shower last night.
Randomize
