im pretty sure that there was a mint leaf in my poop this morning. i love mojito season.
i was like. eff you dude i'm 100% american. i went to a high school prom and i like springstein songs and i take rides in chevrolets.
i think my mom would be mad if i was pregnant. last time i was she grounded me for a week.
It was an awkward 3some. I took her from behind while he just made out with her.
I don't remember his name but he sat in the bathroom and gave us both advice...
being able to look good while almost puking is a skill that takes a lot of puking to develop.
It was horrifying, i havent seen a girls mouth open that wide since that one episode of Goosebumps..
Topless bubble bath with a lesbian is debatable as a gay experience.
He is currently pregaming mini golf. MINI GOLF.
Once you mention butt plugs, conversations always take a turn for the worst.
Sorry, all I could picture was you jamming your dick into a lemon.
Is it wrong that I get drunk and let him eat me out then fall asleep? He offers me so much and yet I do nothing. I feel like a republican.
My legs feel like baby dolphins
Cocaine is ok on a cleanse, right?
The last thing I remember was them slipping shots into my beer bong, and me being happy about it
Randomize
