woke up this morning wit a massive hangover. walked to my truck and found at least 35 for sale signs, a stop sign, and a julie kim sign...need answers
yea, you decided to become a real estate agent last night on the way home from the party. You started bitchin about how Julie Kim was stealing all your buisness....
I just had one of those moments where i was really sad that i'll never get to be asian.
bro im too drunk for your spanish code words. did you fuck her or not.
He gets creativity points for the hot sauce. But it may be awhile until my nipples forgive him
I had to step in when you tried to make it rain baking powder on my sister
You took a bar mat shot.
Was this before or after he told that homeless man outside the bar about his past sexual experiences?
I woke up this morning covered in blood and peanut butter. I am now safe from vampires with nut allergies.
Dude, she found the red hair dye from 4th of July. then she proceeded to give you a red mohawk for a more patriotic thanksgiving eve. How do you not remember that?
You're alright. You just passed out while we were having sex. Then I'm pretty sure you peed. So I went home.
I remember having the weirdest thoughts and thinking our room was a compass and we were in the compass or something.
took over 12 bombs tonight and we still aren't hooking up. Wait how am I functioning
You was so high that you insisted that you heard someone whistle, then you insisted they was trapped in the wall!
Holy shit dude........stairs
he said he only had one rule...that he'd only go down on me 3x a day. so far this is turning into the best relationship ever.
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