The drink u got me is pineapple something w. Cigarete ashes in it.ima drink it anyway
we hooked up on one of my student's desks last night...i can't decide if i'm ashamed or massively proud of myself
dude you teach first grade wtf
Haha im Trying. This detox stuff tastes nasty. It's bad when the only thing that came to mind when i took the first sip was how good it would be with Vodka
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
He took a banana and in front of everyone showed her how he wanted it done.
Starting drinking whiskey at eight. Already had ten girls looking up my kilt to make sure I'm wearing it right.
yeah, she started doing yoga and cocaine....looks good on her.
The bartender gave me the kids toys. Paddle ball & a gecko.
OH DEAR GOD. He looks like if u licked him he'd taste like bourbon, sex and sunshine.
Logically he should not be walking around...after that fall he should be in a hospital in a medically induced coma
Well my grandma put the turkey in the oven for 4 hours and didn't have the oven on.
I am pretty sure I just put SoCo in the bird feeder
My doctor said I can only have one drink at a time, ever, from now on. My life has officially started its decline.
i definitely signed you up to receive text message notifications from a jukebox last night. Not even sorry.
I was so hungover at work I had my shirt on backwards. I had no idea how I managed to get through today puke free.
Randomize
