Hey cutie is the game almost over? I'm making dinner for us it'll be ready soon. Xox
You would rather make fucking dinner than watch a hockey game that rivals the epic-ness of miracle, the one of the biggest upsets in sport history? Babe I don't know if I can date a girl with such terrible priorities.
I seriously might throw up right now. In class. Sunglasses on. I'm getting too old for this.
Down at Ground Zero right now. So many people here. It's the most patriotic game of grabass Ive ever seen.
If you could smell my eyes you'd understand the whole story
If you listen closely you can hear the sound of inbreeding and shame.
Dude i swear to christ if he sends me one more pic of a "magnificent dump" im changing my number
BECKY! ITS ANDY FROM LAST NIGHT WITH THE PILL
Andy, Sorry you have the wrong number. But good luck with Becky!
Got into Princeton. So excited about the mommy-issue-over-achieving-cock I get to ride the next 4 years!!!
I mean there are things broken right and left, I woke up surrounded by dog statues, and we had a vodka bubble bath.
Oh my lord it is too early in the morning to be that horny freak
my vagina doesn't wear a watch
What exactly is it about Doctor Who thigh high socks with a matching shirt that says "take me I'm yours!"
You casually put your finger in my ass and other people are weird..
Wait, there's no way I said I would suck his dick. I know drunk Katie.
No, you told him to suck YOUR dick.
See now that sounds like drunk Katie.
I just found three upside down bottles of grapejuice in a triangle around the air freshener above my toilet... I guess it was one of those nights
maybe you should have closed the porn before you gave the professor your computer to hook up to the projector?
Randomize
