I can die happy now, I have been kicked out of strip clubs on six different continents
just hooked up with an air force officer in a hotel room paid for by the military. i feel like i should go around thanking taxpayers for the assist.
No stds, not pregs, and lost two pounds. I'd call that a successful two years of grad school.
Did you seriously take investment advice from our coke dealer?
There's cake. And donuts. And strippers. It's like 5 year old me and 20 year old me are throwing a party together...
I burst into tears on the boat this morning because we bumped a duck in the head. I am way too hung over for today
I either just got free sex or a nice jail sentence. Text me in 10 to verify.
He was barking to the beat of "I like to fuck" and then chugged 3 beers and fell off the deck.. I should have gotten community service hours
by the way whatever wisdom you imparted upon me last night was lost to whatever i smoked out of a beer can.
You know it's really hard to draft fantasy football players in a crowded bar when I have a raging hard on
I need a hoe opinion
go on
Well shit I mean if you get a bunch of cashed up drunk lesbians together in a casino, it's bound to go south at some point
Like I said, all hypothetical...unless, of course, you'd be into that. My heart may skip a beat.
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
Look fucker, my sensibility and attention to detail is the ONLY REASON you're not dead now
Randomize
