So my grandma sent me a doily for my birthday - don't ask why, I don't know. Anyways I put my bong on it, I think it actually classed up the joint.
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
bet u 5 dollars u can't guess were i woke up this morning
oh god.. jail?
better, on the catwalk of the auditorium
Half my face is frozen, my vagina is broken, I'm wearing only gym shorts eating a plate of mashed potatoes, avatar is on my tv. There's a naked guy on my couch whose name idk. I needa talk to you asap
I'm about to pick up E from underneath a random doormat.......how is this remotely normal?
Whenever I walk away from the group without saying anything, NEVER assume I'm just going to the bathroom.
you're usually drunk when you offer. there's one time you called me, told me not to dye my hair red, and asked if i wanted to see your tits.
I have a hunch Mama J got around.
Am I allowed to say that about my own mom?
You can't just take out your bong for hits in public places... That's what pipes are for. You've got to be stealthier.
No, it's okay because this is the city of trees.
YOU'VE ALREADY BEEN BUSTED MORE THAN ONCE. THAT'S NOT A VALID EXCUSE FOR BONG HITS IN COFFEE GARDEN
Or I could hide in your trunk so you can sneak out of putt putt for sex breaks
we dropped acid in chinatown. worst. idea. ever. too many colors. and nobody has any idea where steve is.
If you magically turned into a tall white gay guy, ignore this message. If not, then I'm sure someone has your fb password.
Who died my cat blue again?
Why is there a horse in the backyard?
I stayed at my gfs last night. This is all on you.
one nice thing about being home: no walks of shame, just drives of shame
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