the thought of Anne Coulter teabagging Dick Cheney kills me everytime.
just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
I just remembered yelling "they're gonna let me be a lawyer! Me! Why would they do that?"
Hey is it bad when your boss leans over your desk and tells you "you smell like the Rainforest Cafe"??
He keeps whispering to me that he can't wait to tie my hands up with my wig?
The liquor store was handing out free shots of some new expensive vodka, but they caught on the fourth time we came back in different outfits. Politics.
She thought that based on the way she feels that she got drugged last night, but come on, her turn on word is hello, who needs to drug that??
I passed out in all my clothes. like my purse too..and with a cup of water next to me..and my last tweet last night was "Bye."
BUT I think maybe Thursday in celebration of America we should probably tan and see how fast we can finish everything in the liquor cabinet.
Riding the train home at 6 am for class still drunk is losing its novelty in my junior year
He's a psychology major, so instead of becoming a stripper, I'm just working out my daddy issues with him. And his cock. And spankings.
They're much more educational now btw. Don't judge.
Rumor has it that you want to bring me soup in exchange for a blow job.
Masturbated while waiting for my face mask to dry, so it was a productive night.
Have u seen my vagina and my gorilla costume? Im in need of it.
That married penis I’ve been riding offered to pay off my student loans. I was going to break it off because he has lousy stamina. Is being debt free worth putting up with mediocre sex?
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