Theres this fat girl in desperate need of the proactive factory in my class and as i watch her shovel food in her face I am struggling to not only keep down my meager lunch but also to stay straight. Eliza Dushku couldnt even get my flacid dick to move
It's a law of Nature, girls naturally hate eachother. It's only when there's no competition for a mate that they can hate each other a little less and then are appropriated into the "BFF" slot.
If burritos were dicks, we'd have a serious relationship problem on our hands. Just saying.
I misunderstood what a threesome is. Please come pick me up.
The hot Japanese girl in my class just said her "favorite sexy American actor is Nick Cage." That, I can work with.
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
This is a pre-sorry for hitting on and then sleeping with you're ex
I have no idea how I got home or why I am naked but I assume I owe you a thank you...
If she has AMC, I may have to fuck her today. I want to catch up on the walking dead.
Unless he's under 18, in which case you put him back where you found him this instant.
The thing about being single is like Sunday morning sex is nice but so is Sunday morning eating Nutella from the jar in your underwear
Oohh. Then yes, he is the Alpha Fuckboy.
I don't know if the puke on my pants is mine or not
Last time he showed up for Christmas he went on and on about backpacking somewhere and getting ghonnorreah twice.
Im sorry for telling you id rather jump into traffic than date you again. I didnt mean to be so rude
Randomize
